Chapter 1

Eighty years old this year.

I’d lived one hell of a long time, without a lick of sense or fear.

A boy might grow older, but he never grows up!

I used to dream of eternal youth and immortality, stuffing my face with anything that was supposed to be good for me. Now it all seems pointless.

They say some of those Taoist bastards ascend to heaven and become immortals, but that’s hardly going to happen to me.

Was it fifteen years ago?

There were some long-nosed Taoist bastards from Wudang who called me wicked.

Me? Why?

I don’t traffic in people, and I don’t rob anyone.

Naturally, I’ve never rescued anyone who does bad things, either.

Thieves, mountain bandits, river pirates.

Getting away with it is one thing, but why would I rescue some moron too stupid to keep from getting caught? Break them out of prison? Utter nonsense.

And yet.

They lumped me in with the lot and hurled abuse at me, just because I led the unorthodox faction they belonged to.

I couldn’t let that slide, so I got a little angry. Next thing I knew, there was a war, with everyone calling it the Great War of the Orthodox and Unorthodox or some such thing.

There were massive battles befitting that grand name, but I wasn’t actually there.

Why? Because Wudang had been my target from the start.

I didn’t give a damn whether the others fought. I went to Wudang, burned down three palaces, and tore the heads off the sect leader and every last elder.

I’d been generous enough to ask them to hand over only the bastards who’d insulted me, but they shoved swords in my face. That was why I did it.

Then they called me vile, wicked, and petty all over again. What a bunch of jokers.

Anyway, we called a truce, but apparently Wudang, that thousand-year-old holy site of Taoism, lost so much of its power that it was pushed to the very bottom of the Nine Great Sects.

Well, that’s got nothing to do with me.

Don’t they say you reap what you sow?

Of course, I never got along with those Taoist bastards in the first place. A pack of hypocrites spouting pretty words with nothing behind them…

Forget dealing with them. Just thinking about them makes me feel like I’m breaking out in hives.

Whew. Anyway, my mind keeps getting clearer, bringing back vivid memories of the past.

Is this what they call the final flicker before death?

With an effort, I turned my head for one last look at the subordinates who had spent their lives by my side.

My disciple, the elders… Dependable bastards who had helped me build Sapacheon into what it was today.

But I don’t see Cheon U-myeong.

He’s more than a little dim, but he’s the most loyal of the lot.

Come to think of it, has he still not returned from going off to find me the herb of immortality?

It doesn’t even exist…

He should just come back.

Knowing him, he’s probably rummaging around some mountainside right now, digging up weeds. He doesn’t know a thing about medicinal herbs.

I’d like to see his face once more before I die.

In any case, I keep getting shorter of breath. It seems my time has come to return to heaven.

How hard had I worked to reach this position?

Of all the bastards who started out with me back then, none had done as well as I had.

Master of Sapacheon, which shared dominion over today’s martial world with the Sun and Moon Demonic Cult and the Orthodox Martial Alliance.

Hyeokryeon Mugang, Lord of Sapacheon.

That was my name.

Betraying the capable, trampling the inept, stabbing the ones who helped me in the back…

Through one betrayal after another, I had risen from triumph to triumph until I became the supreme ruler of the unorthodox faction.

People pointed fingers and called me despicable, but what did those fools know? That was how I weathered this ruthless world and reigned as king over the unorthodox faction for nearly forty years.

I could hold any woman I wanted, whenever I wanted, and my secret treasury overflowed with gold, silver, and jewels.

I was the most powerful man around, damn it. I could wipe out an ordinary sect with a wave of my hand.

But a man’s life rests in heaven’s hands…

How could a mere mortal defy heaven’s will?

When it’s time to go, you go.

I don’t have any great regrets now… Actually, there are a few things.

If I’d known I was going like this, I’d have spent every last coin in that treasury.

I should have dealt with those orthodox faction bastards who dared stick their blades into me.

And I haven’t even had a night of passion with Hwayang, my new concubine!

Hah…

I can feel my sigh turn into a labored breath as it escapes my lips.

I hear my dependable subordinates whispering, their mournful faces turned toward me.

My loyal…

“Fuck, why won’t he die?”

Loyal…

“He’s stuffed himself with so much healthy shit, his lifeline must be too tough to snap.”

“Son of a bitch. Stubborn bastard.”

These fuckers!

“Thinking about how that evil, childish bastard worked us half to death brings tears to my eyes.”

As if cursing me weren’t enough, one of them was actually blubbering over how fortunate it was that I was finally croaking.

“Don’t worry. I’ll do my best.”

That was my only disciple, pushing sixty this year.

To think I’d raised that bastard as my disciple, giving everything I had and more. What the hell had I done?

“You’ve truly suffered so much, Young Lord.”

“Indeed.”

“Still, what a relief, eh? I was so afraid that idiot Corps Commander Cheon U-myeong might actually find the herb of immortality, I even set out a bowl of pure water and prayed every day.”

“Exactly. Imagine having to watch a vicious, lawless bastard like that live on without even aging. Just thinking about it gives me the shivers. Ugh.”

They seem to think they’re whispering, but I can hear every word.

“Let’s make a good go of things together now.”

They’re all rallying around my disciple.

Why don’t you just strangle me and get it over with!

Is this how the people who cursed me and pointed fingers at me felt? You vile, wicked bastards.

Well, they were always like this. I’d lived the same way myself…

In the distance, a figure in black wavers like a vision.

It must be an underworld emissary, come to fetch me. The fellow’s face is so pale, you’d think he’d powdered it.

Hah. Fine. Let’s go.

What would I live any longer for?

The things of this world grow hazy, while the underworld emissary becomes clearer and clearer.

Hyeokryeon Mugang…

A low, resonant voice sends a chill through my ears.

The first call.

They say that when he calls you a third time, your ties to the living world are severed for good, don’t they?

There really isn’t much time left now. Stop making a sorry spectacle of yourself and just close your ey—

“My looord!”

A thunderous voice rings out, and a welcome figure rushes into the bedchamber, his splendid beard streaming behind him like the Lord of the Magnificent Beard himself.

Cheon U-myeong, commander of the Iron Sword Corps.

He went out to find the herb of immortality and only came back when I was on the verge of death. Typical of him.

Yes, at least I have you.

At least I get to see the face of someone who actually had a scrap of loyalty to me before I go…

“The herb of immortality! I’ve finally found the herb of immortality! Hurry and eat it, my lord!”

Every face in the room crumpled at his words.

Wait… What?

What the fuck are you talking about at a time like this!

The herb of immortality? That stuff actually exists? What, am I going to live?

Suddenly, the will to live comes surging back!

“Quickly! Please, eat it!”

Before anyone can stop him, Cheon U-myeong starts cramming the herb into my mouth, dirt and all.

Yes! Good work!

Hurry up, you ignorant bastard… Fuck, at least shake the dirt off.

“My lord, why aren’t you chewing? Chew! You must chew!”

Hyeokryeon Mugang…

For fuck’s sake, somebody shut that bastard from the underworld up!

But I can’t even move, let alone speak.

“Damn it!”

With an irritated shout, Cheon U-myeong pulls the herb of immortality he’d forced into my mouth back out and clenches it in his fist.

W-wait. You’re not going to…

Your fears always come true.

Squeeeze.

You’re squeezing it?

With unwashed hands?

“I’ll feed it to you, my lord!”

“Damn it! Stop him! Stop Commander Cheon! Hurry!”

The disciples and elders rushed at Cheon U-myeong like madmen and tried to drag him away.

You fuckers! Leave him alone! I said leave him alone! Does the thought of me living a little longer piss you off that much?

Hyeokryeon…

As if mocking the chaos, the third call began.

Ah, wait!

I haven’t finished eating! I’m not done yet!

Mu…

Fuck it. It’s all or nothing now.

I forced every last bit of strength into my mouth.

Fortunately, my tongue still works.

Forgetting my pride, I summoned all the strength I had left and sucked on Cheon U-myeong’s hand for all I was worth.

Gulp.

As my tongue lapped frantically, the mangled pulp of the herb slipped down into my throat.

But the underworld emissary had only one syllable left before he finished calling my name three times. I could distinctly feel the tether binding my soul to my body stretch taut, about to snap.

Ah, damn it. That useless bastard. Why couldn’t he have come a little sooner? I could have lived. Eternal youth and immortality—that impossible feat could have been mine.

Gang…

Now it’s truly over. There’s no going back.

My money… My Hwayang… My night of passion…

But then.

The herb’s energy began spreading through my entire body in an instant.

The desperate will I had wrung out of myself to stay alive mingled with the herb’s medicinal power, clinging stubbornly to the fraying tether of my soul.

When the tether held despite his three calls, the underworld emissary’s expression turned bewildered.

And that wasn’t all. He seized my soul, already halfway out of my body, and pulled with all his might, as if determined to rip it free by force.

Hey! Ah! My hair! Agh! That hurts! It hurts, you bastard!

Pop!

He lost his grip.

My scalp hurt like hell, as if he’d pulled out a whole clump of hair.

Heh heh heh. But he’d lost his grip.

The underworld emissary’s face twisted into something demonic as he watched me return to my body.

I’m alive. I won.

It looks like the herb of immortality was real after all.

Cheon U-myeong, you wonderful bastard…

You’ve saved my life.

Once I’m back on my feet, I’ll have to treat you to something grand.

But the bastard from the underworld shows no sign of leaving.

After glaring at me for a long while, he approached, laid a hand on my body, and recited what sounded like an incantation. Clearly, he still meant to steal my soul somehow.

Heh heh. Keep trying, you bastard! It’s the herb of immortality! The herb of immortality!

Even Qin Shi Huang died without getting to eat it, but I fucking did!

I clenched my right fist, clasped that wrist with my other hand, and demurely held it out to the underworld emissary.

But the bastard gives me a knowing smirk.

Huh? You’re smirking?

You fucking moron. Let’s see who wins.

At a time like this, there’s only one answer.

Hold out.

Heh heh. When it comes to patience, no one in the martial world can match me.

I’ll keep my eyes shut tight until he fucks off!

I won’t move a muscle!

I am Hyeokryeon Mugang, Lord of Sapacheon!